The fourth episode of the Parent Project Podcast is all about empathy. How do you role model empathy with your children? And how can you show empathy for them, when they are not at their best? Well, they say empathy is a muscle, so you can strengthen it.
In the empathy podcast, one parent confesses that it is harder for her to show empathy when her ego is involved. Another one says it is easier if you can relate to what your kids are struggling with. A third one knows that when she’s triggered, or dysregulated, it takes a minute to remind herself, “that it’s not about me in this moment, it’s to help my child through something.”
Podcast host Kate Nash thinks that being empathic towards your kids, is all about setting clear boundaries. “Because a relationship with no boundaries can feel unsafe So sometimes the way we show empathy may seem contrary to the notion that empathy is full of love and compassion. It sometimes is about recognizing what your kids need and offering them the guidelines to get there.”
Listen to episode 4 here (or in your favourite podcast app)
For each episode of the Parent Project Podcast, host Kate Nash curated games, activities, resources, reflections and family practices to use, listen to, and do at home.
Watch
What is empathy and what is the best way to ease someone’s pain and suffering? In this beautifully animated short video, Dr. Brené Brown reminds us that we can only create a genuine empathic connection if we are brave enough to really get in touch with our own fragilities.
Activity
Empathy exploration
Participants write down scenarios that happen at home where they have an easy time feeling and practicing empathy and scenarios where they have a hard time feeling and practicing empathy.
Fold them all up and put them in the middle of the table.
Give everyone a piece of paper to keep track of their answers.
Have each person choose one, one at a time, and read a scenario out loud to everyone.
Each person can mark down whether they would or would not be able to have empathy in that scenario.
Feel free to discuss the why or why not for each answer for those who want to.
At the end notice how many scenarios you are or are not able to practice empathy for.
Talk about what you notice about the times you can and cannot.
Talk about the ways that everyone may be able to grow their empathy muscles in more scenarios.
Reflection
Listen to the podcast and answer these questions:
When is it easy for you to feel empathy for your children?
When is it hardest for you to feel empathy? Or for what child or which situations are the most difficult for you to feel empathy?
How do you role model empathy to your kids? How do you role model your practice of empathy to your grandkids? How do you role model being a person who practices empathy?
What are tools that you use to practice empathy for your children, especially when they may have a different opinion than us or a different experience and perspective?
Take Home Message
In hard parenting choices, allowing your children’s perspective to be heard and acknowledged while still holding your own boundaries. Often times, people just want to be heard.
Photo credit: Mike Scheid/Unsplash